12.11.2017
Morning 7am-ish
Generally on a sunday morning I never wake up before 7am. Having a morning shift office, Saturday and Sunday morning sleep is my "cup of coffee" to have a energyfull week start. Well but that Sunday was bit diferent.
On 26th and 27th October 2017 I had my 2nd IUI procedure. Doctor did ask me to have a home pregnancy test on 12th November. Generally these weeks long wait are exhausting. And finally doing one failed pregnancy test is again heartbreaking. My first IUI was a failure. I did it on 18th Aug 2017. And my period in that month came early, so does the disappointment. One who is struggling through infertility will understand how much late periods mean to them!
After August I took a break. Break from everything chaotic that was happening in my life then. My father inlaw expired in the same month. We finished his last rituals. And i thought, it will be a good break for me and for my husband as from last few months we both were fighting father inlws's illness and our infertility. I stopped medicines whatever i was taking for my "egg growth". Even though medicines never ask one to do workouts , but thoughts of taking it in a particular time, make you exhausted. Then comes the best part; to have "relation", during the peak of your ovulation time! And trust me, those "target oriented" sexes can never give anyone pleasure!
Well, i wanted rest from all the above!
September went peacefully. And then from October i started nagging my husband again to opt for another IUI in that month. I told him, this will be the last try for this year. We will try next year directly if nothing happens this time. I talked to my doctor and she scheduled my appointment for IUI on 26th and 27th October. Before that as procedure i went through some niddles to maintain my egg growth.
IUI is not very painful but yes not comforting as well. First and foremost, i hate to remove my cloths and wear nothing but that hospital gown! It can make anyone feel sick.
IUI is a procedure where doctor collects the semen of husband and process it. Actually centrifuge it to extract only the "real sperm" part. And then with the help of a catheter, that material would be inserted inside the wife's uterus. Trust me that pinching feel of catheter while it enters the uterus, is not good. But then, when you are fighting infertility for years, this pain feels nothing!
When I did my first IUI, my hopes of positive pregnancy was in its peak! I used to calculate the supposedly due date also for the baby! But it was a failure.
I did the second IUI but I was not expecting anything from it. May be because I was scared to hope.. may be because I have had enough sight of failed pregnancy test kits! May be because I was not ready for another failed test. However after my sevond IUI, my waiting days went rather too quickly. I was tremendously busy in office. Attended few events, had a special trip to parlour to highlight my hairs for the first time and many more. But I kept in mind when my doctor asked me to have a home pregnancy test.
I very clearly remember, day before my test, we, the husband and wife, fought! Over some silly nonsense as usual. I was not talking to him for whole day and evening at around 8pm I remembered that I didnot have any kit at home. I asked husband to bring one immediately, breaking my day long silence!
On 12th I woke up normally.. no butterflies were in my stomach. I opened the kit and casually took the test and kept the kit inside washroom without checking any result. Normally I would have preferred to stand in the washroom staring at the kit waiting impatiently! But as I told, that day was different.
I came back and slept again and also had a plan to continue my cold war with my husband!
I woke up again after few minutes. Reluctant to leave the bed I checked some online breakfast options. And then I marched towards the washroom. Even though I was hopeless but still I was hoping for a silver lining as well..
and then... hei wait a minute! What are these two pink lines mean anyway!? I checked the cover of the kit again confirming my years long understanding of home pregnancy test procedure! YES!! 2 pink lines means - POSITIVE!
Damn! Am i finally PREGNANT?!
I looked towards my husband. Sleeping as usual. I sat near him on the bed and checked the kit again. I pushed him.. "hei shona.. u have to see this!" Trust me there were no tears rolling down my cheeks as I was imagining all these past years.. my heart was beating fast. I guess I was feeling like peeing again.
He opened his half shut eyes and looked towards me.. I showed him the kit. And his eyes were wide open! "true?!" he asked.
"I don't know!" I was not sure for real!
He went back bed again and did an announcement, "have to save money from now on!!"
As my husband was back to sleepy mode again, I rushed to the nearest medical store to buy few more "accurate" kits. Ended up buying 5 different companies'. Did the tests again. By the meantime my husband was awake and he immediately took an appointment for blood test.. While I was standing and checking those kits, it was not even a minute, within seconds all the five kits had two dark pink lines! Thise were so strong!
My days were never the same since that day.. And today exactly after one year, i have a happy, chirpy, peeing-poopy 4 months old baby boy in my arms !
Cannot be more blessed than this!
Aaahhh Motherhood; you beauty!
Morning 7am-ish
Generally on a sunday morning I never wake up before 7am. Having a morning shift office, Saturday and Sunday morning sleep is my "cup of coffee" to have a energyfull week start. Well but that Sunday was bit diferent.
On 26th and 27th October 2017 I had my 2nd IUI procedure. Doctor did ask me to have a home pregnancy test on 12th November. Generally these weeks long wait are exhausting. And finally doing one failed pregnancy test is again heartbreaking. My first IUI was a failure. I did it on 18th Aug 2017. And my period in that month came early, so does the disappointment. One who is struggling through infertility will understand how much late periods mean to them!
After August I took a break. Break from everything chaotic that was happening in my life then. My father inlaw expired in the same month. We finished his last rituals. And i thought, it will be a good break for me and for my husband as from last few months we both were fighting father inlws's illness and our infertility. I stopped medicines whatever i was taking for my "egg growth". Even though medicines never ask one to do workouts , but thoughts of taking it in a particular time, make you exhausted. Then comes the best part; to have "relation", during the peak of your ovulation time! And trust me, those "target oriented" sexes can never give anyone pleasure!
Well, i wanted rest from all the above!
September went peacefully. And then from October i started nagging my husband again to opt for another IUI in that month. I told him, this will be the last try for this year. We will try next year directly if nothing happens this time. I talked to my doctor and she scheduled my appointment for IUI on 26th and 27th October. Before that as procedure i went through some niddles to maintain my egg growth.
IUI is not very painful but yes not comforting as well. First and foremost, i hate to remove my cloths and wear nothing but that hospital gown! It can make anyone feel sick.
IUI is a procedure where doctor collects the semen of husband and process it. Actually centrifuge it to extract only the "real sperm" part. And then with the help of a catheter, that material would be inserted inside the wife's uterus. Trust me that pinching feel of catheter while it enters the uterus, is not good. But then, when you are fighting infertility for years, this pain feels nothing!
When I did my first IUI, my hopes of positive pregnancy was in its peak! I used to calculate the supposedly due date also for the baby! But it was a failure.
I did the second IUI but I was not expecting anything from it. May be because I was scared to hope.. may be because I have had enough sight of failed pregnancy test kits! May be because I was not ready for another failed test. However after my sevond IUI, my waiting days went rather too quickly. I was tremendously busy in office. Attended few events, had a special trip to parlour to highlight my hairs for the first time and many more. But I kept in mind when my doctor asked me to have a home pregnancy test.
I very clearly remember, day before my test, we, the husband and wife, fought! Over some silly nonsense as usual. I was not talking to him for whole day and evening at around 8pm I remembered that I didnot have any kit at home. I asked husband to bring one immediately, breaking my day long silence!
On 12th I woke up normally.. no butterflies were in my stomach. I opened the kit and casually took the test and kept the kit inside washroom without checking any result. Normally I would have preferred to stand in the washroom staring at the kit waiting impatiently! But as I told, that day was different.
I came back and slept again and also had a plan to continue my cold war with my husband!
I woke up again after few minutes. Reluctant to leave the bed I checked some online breakfast options. And then I marched towards the washroom. Even though I was hopeless but still I was hoping for a silver lining as well..
and then... hei wait a minute! What are these two pink lines mean anyway!? I checked the cover of the kit again confirming my years long understanding of home pregnancy test procedure! YES!! 2 pink lines means - POSITIVE!
Damn! Am i finally PREGNANT?!
I looked towards my husband. Sleeping as usual. I sat near him on the bed and checked the kit again. I pushed him.. "hei shona.. u have to see this!" Trust me there were no tears rolling down my cheeks as I was imagining all these past years.. my heart was beating fast. I guess I was feeling like peeing again.
He opened his half shut eyes and looked towards me.. I showed him the kit. And his eyes were wide open! "true?!" he asked.
"I don't know!" I was not sure for real!
He went back bed again and did an announcement, "have to save money from now on!!"
As my husband was back to sleepy mode again, I rushed to the nearest medical store to buy few more "accurate" kits. Ended up buying 5 different companies'. Did the tests again. By the meantime my husband was awake and he immediately took an appointment for blood test.. While I was standing and checking those kits, it was not even a minute, within seconds all the five kits had two dark pink lines! Thise were so strong!
My days were never the same since that day.. And today exactly after one year, i have a happy, chirpy, peeing-poopy 4 months old baby boy in my arms !
Cannot be more blessed than this!
Aaahhh Motherhood; you beauty!
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